Thats ok, thanks for the information. I will resolve my issues.

I give up on that.
The component's description clearly states:

1. On creating a new member account an email will be sent to the member as usual
2. But instead of activating the member automatically, the site admin receives a notifcation email ....

That is TWO MAILS being sent. So where is the point that leads to the assumption that this component would generally prevent Ossn from sending mail?

do i have to remove the disable member self validating component to send any emails out? is the php mailer disabled completely with the component?

Okay, an alternative would be to install Ossn's SMTP client
https://github.com/opensource-socialnetwork/SMTP
, connect to a SMTP server (e.g. gmail) of your choice and route all mail traffic this way,
instead of using the mailer of your server, which may be blocked, black-listed, ... whaterver.

I currently think there is a block on my ip address, so i dont seem to be getting the emails from my dedicated server provider for my ossn community. There was a server transfer from vps to dedicated server and the settings were supposedly all transferred, but....i will try to resolve.

Well,
all I can tell is that I'm running this component on my own site, and it's delivering emails like

A new activation request from Firstname Lastname is pending on
https://comz.z-mans.net/administrator/unvalidated_users

to the address I once configured in my Ossn admin backend -> Site Settings -> Basic -> Owner Emails
without any problems.

So you may verify
- your owner address
- whether these kind of mails have been sent to your spam folder
- whether your site is capable of sending emails at all by using the 'Invite Friends' function on the left menu

Hi Michael, i have that component installed and in operation , i guess what i meant is a component that send an email to my gmail account telling me that an user is registered....unless my email for my server is incorrectly configured and im not recieving the messages from the mentioned component?

Perhaps this is what you're looking for:
Disable Member Self Validating